Little Boys Love Their Mommies

Little boys love their mommies.  If I didn’t know it before, I definitely know it now.

My six year old son had his tonsils out last week and I think if he could crawl up my ass he would.   Sorry.  I know that is a blunt way to say it but it’s the truth.

Alex is very very affectionate to begin with but since his tonsillectomy he has been reeeally mushy.  All he wants is me.  Don’t get me wrong.  I LOVE that he wants me.  But it’s really hard to give him 100% of my attention when I also have a super needy three year old.    Alex is constantly wanting to sit next to me, asks me to watch him play his Nintendo DS, wants me to watch endless hours of Phineas and Ferb with him, and he complains when I don’t do any or all of the above for a long time.  I will do all of these things with him for a little while but I also have other things I need to do.  Dishes and laundry don’t wash themselves.  Plus in all honesty, I’m not the kind of mom that likes to get down on the floor and play with toys.  I must not have that great of an imagination because I can only race a matchbox car around the kitchen floor for so long.  Five minutes max.  Maybe it’s because I’m a girl.  The boy toys just don’t appeal to me.  The most “play” time my boys get with me is when the opt to play the Wii.  That is about the only thing that I can get into and play for a decent amount of time.  Other than that, I’m good for five to ten minutes - maybe.  Good thing Daddy can and will play with the kids.  He jumps right in and will play like a little boy with them for hours.  Again - it must be a gender thing.

What makes all of this even worse is that we have all been stuck in inside all week.  Now I know what it feels like to be on house arrest.

I feel really bad.  I am doing all that I can to keep them both entertained but truthfully, I am going out of my mind.  I finally took them both out to the store with me yesterday to run some errands and although Alex was happy to get out, it was obvious he wasn’t ready.  He fell asleep on the way home and he NEVER does that.  We were only gone for an hour.

I am planning on getting out this weekend to do something fun with the whole family but I’ll have to see how Alex is feeling by then.  I guess I am being overly cautious right now.  I’m just so afraid of taking him out and risking him getting sick while he is still recovering.  His throat is still pretty sore and I’m afraid if he plays too rough he may hurt do something to make it worse.

In the meantime, I guess I’m in for more countless games of Sorry, Clue and movie marathons.  Geez…what is so bad about that anyway?  I wish I could sit around the house all week and do nothing!  But, I am not six years old and full of energy either.

At least through this entire experience I have confirmed that my little boys really do love and need me.  And as much as I may complain, the truth is…I need to be needed.  I love those boys more than my own life and I would do anything for them.  So if I have to sit around the house for a week and pretend that I like to play with their toys so be it.  After all, pretty soon they will be begging me to get out of their faces!

No Picture Perfect Father’s Day THIS Year

Today is Father’s Day and already I know I’m going to have to have a Father’s Day Do-Over.

My poor hubby.

I had a nice relaxing day planned for the Boss but it all went downhill at about 7:15 a.m.

So much for him sleeping in.

Alex woke up screaming in pain from his still healing tonsillectomy.  Dennis woke up shortly after screaming for juice.   And hard as I tried to refrain, I soon found myself screaming at the two of them for screaming.

Hey…if you can’t beat em, join em right?

UGH!

All I wanted was for both of them to be quiet so daddy could sleep in today.   Well THAT obviously wasn’t going to happen.  It was not long before the Boss dragged his tired ass down the stairs and into the family room where the three screaming banshees were to find out what in the hell was going on.

“Sorry Honey.”

Surprisingly, he took it pretty well anyway and remained calm.   I made him a nice breakfast of pancakes topped with fresh strawberries and cream so that seemed to take the edge off a bit.

Until Hurricane Dennis came through.   More whining, more complaining and more demanding than usual.  Nice.  The Boss was slowly starting to lose his cool and I could tell that between being exhausted and irritated, he was definitely on the edge.

I thought maybe I could lift the mood a little by presenting him with all of his gifts and it did work…until the tantrums started.

Good God the tantrums Dennis has are beyond description.  Full blown kicking and pounding the floor, head flailing backward.  And this goes on and on and on.  Today it was an hour.  Happy Freakin Father’s Day.

I felt so bad for my husband.  Not only did he have to hear the tantrum, but he was also a victim of it.  While he was trying to calm Dennis down, he got punched in the eye.  And this is not the first time his eyes have been incapacitated.  No.  Not the first at all.  In fact, the Boss’ eyes have been poked out and punched more times than I can count.  Sometimes it’s not intentional though.  When he is playing down on the floor with the kids, nine times out of ten his eyes will fall victim to a stray finger or inanimate object.  To be honest, it’s a miracle the man can even still see.

So needless to say today was not the ideal Father’s Day.  Not by a long shot.   My husband just left to get away from our little monster get some air so hopefully when he gets back he will have calmed down a bit.

Yep.  Today will have to get a do-over for sure.

I Am No Fan of Doctors

Doctors suck.  Sorry but that’s how I feel.  I cannot tell you how incredibly sick I am of doctors.  It’s bad enough when they screw up something having to do with me, but I’m a whole other animal when it involves my kids.  This last experience I had is the icing on the cake.  First I need to give you a little back story.

My son Alex has had a chronic cough for the past two years.  Not your average cough though.  I’m talking about the kind of cough that was so bad that it would keep not only him awake, but all of us - for hours on end in the middle of the night.  It started shortly after his fourth birthday and a bout of coughing would last for weeks at a time.

We started with his pediatrician thinking it was just a cold.  He was treated with cough medicine and sent on his way.  Well the cough never went away.  So then we were given antibiotics.  The cough did go away for a while.  But a few weeks later he got sick again.  So after several trips back and forth to our pediatrician, I figured whatever Alex had was more than just a cold and we had to find someone who could get to the bottom of it. I had a feeling that maybe the problem was caused by his adenoids and/or tonsils since I had problems with both when I was a kid.  So I took him to a highly regarded Ear Nose and Throat (ENT) specialist.

At the first examination, the ENT we saw in Florida at the time who was VERY conservative, did confirm that Alex’s adenoids and tonsils were “larger than normal”.  However, since Alex did not have sleep apnea or snore, and he had NEVER had strep throat, he told us he wanted to “watch” Alex for a few months before he even considered any kind of surgery.  He sent us to an allergist where Alex was given all sorts of allergy and asthma testing.  He tested negative for both.  The doctor thought maybe the coughing was due to allergies so we went through all of that and every allergy medicine possible for several months which didn’t do squat.

Then the ENT thought the cough might be caused from acid reflux so he sent us to a gastroenterologist.  We had yet another test done called a barium swallow to see if there was some anatomical reason in his stomach and throat (they watched him swallow during this test while standing behind an x-ray machine) was the cause if there even WAS reflux but again…nope.  No anatomical problems.  Oh and I forgot to mention that we also had a cat scan taken of his sinuses.  Clear.

I cannot even tell you how frustrated I was.  They couldn’t find a cause for this horrible and very productive/juicy cough that was keeping my son up half the night.  WTF!!!   And still, the ENT did not see a reason to have Alex’s adenoids removed because he didn’t have sleep apnea or snore.   So every time we went in there because the cough was so unbearable, all he did was give us another band-aid antibiotic.

Then we moved to up here to North Carolina.  We were hoping that maybe there was something in the Florida air or in our 30 year old town house that was causing the problem and that maybe a change of environment would clear it up.  No dice.   Again, I had to find an ENT up here.   So I found a guy that was highly recommended and supposedly very good.

The first time I met and him and I had to explain Alex’s entire history with these coughs I was practically crying out of frustration.   He immediately said that his adenoids needed to come out. Well hallefreakinlujah!  He said he had no doubt that from everything I described that it was the adenoids and that they needed to come out since they were obviously not doing their job by catching all of the bacteria they were supposed to.

So we promptly made an appointment to have Alex’s adenoids removed.  Before the surgery though, I met with the Dr. to go over everything and I specifically asked him if we should go ahead and remove the tonsils as well.  I was concerned that whatever bacteria was attacking Alex’s adenoids would then go to his tonsils.  I was assured “it doesn’t work like that” and that should not happen.   He said “if you want to take the tonsils out I will do it, but I honestly don’t see a need to since he has never had any problems with his tonsils.  They ARE big, but he hasn’t had any strep throat infections so you don’t really need to take them out.”   My husband and I went back and forth with this and had the doctor advised us to go ahead and do it, we would have in a heartbeat since Alex would already be under for the adenoids.  But the doctor said it was up to us.  My husband and I talked it over and decided NOT to do it since we weren’t advised to and the recovery period would be a lot longer and much more painful.  We figured if he really didn’t need it than why should we put him through that?  Well I obviously should have went with my gut since it turns out my fear came true and now he has had strep throat 3 times in the last 2 months.

When I asked the doctor last week if the bacteria that was attacking the adenoids is now going to the tonsils he said “it looks that way which is really weird because that never ever happens. I can’t even remember if/when I’ve ever had a patient who has had that happen after an adenoidectomy.”  Are you kidding me???  I guess we are the case study then huh?

So now I have to put my poor kid under again and I am a friggin wreck! I know it’s a very common thing and he did great the last time so I’m probably freaking myself out for nothing but if God forbid anything happens to him I will never forgive myself!  Especially when it could have been done the first time and I royally screwed that one up.

I just want it to be over.  All of it.  The surgery, the sickness, the coughing and the constant use of various medications.  Please pray for us that this works!

I Have a Confession to Make…

I am a wholesale whore.  There.  I said it.  It’s true.  I LOVE wholesale clubs.  I am a huge fan of Costco, BJ’s and Sam’s Club and I would have all three memberships too if I could afford it.  Okay, well I DID have all three memberships once.  But when I realized that I couldn’t go into one of these warehouses without spending at least $100 (usually much more), I decided that I was out of control and spending way too much money so I gave up one of my memberships.  Oh and believe me…that was a sad sad day.

Why do I love them so much you ask?  Sure Sams, Costco and BJ’s are great places to buy things in bulk and I do.  But besides food, I love to buy books, music, DVDs, toys and clothes there.  I have found so many great items at these places and around the holidays…forget it.  They are the first place I go to do my Christmas shopping.  The only other store that I love to shop in more than a wholesale club is Target.  I frequent Target so much that I call it my “home away from home” and my 3 year old has dubbed it the “bulls-eye store”.  If I tell him “we have to go to the store today” , the first thing he will ask is “are we going to the bulls-eye store?”   Hey I know it sounds pathetic but I honestly believe I am doing my boys and their future wives a favor.  Because of me and my shopaholic tendencies, I am raising my boys to be men who actually like to shop!  Right?  Right.

So yes, I am a wholesale whore and after tomorrow I may need to lock myself in the house because the temptation will be too much to bear.  In a few short hours, just a ten minute drive from my house, a brand spankin’ new Walmart Supercenter is opening and behind it in the same freakin parking lot is -wait for it… a BRAND new Sams Club.  ALL IN ONE PLACE!   Am I in trouble now!   Although Target is my favorite (aside from the wholesale clubs of course), I have been known to do some serious damage in Walmart too.  Oh boy…I am soooo in trouble!

Disney’s Dole Whip Mix Is The BEST Recipe And It Delivers

I finally broke down and ordered a bag of Dole Whip mix (the delicious creamy pineapple dessert from Aloha Isle in Disney World).  You may have searched to find the perfect Dole Whip recipe and although some that I have found are a decent substitute, they are not the real thing.  So, once I discovered that you can order the Dole Whip mix directly from the same company that supplies Disney, I was stoked!  It took me a while to justify spending money on something I could make myself but again, the copycat recipes out there do not even compare to the real thing.  Besides, I had the perfect excuse.  We were having an end of school year party to celebrate my son’s graduation from kindergarten.  It was a field day theme and we planned to spend the entire day outside so what better way to end the day’s festivities in the sweltering hot sun than by cooling off with a delicious Dole Whip?   I can’t think of any.

I placed my order on a Monday and it was shipped Priority Mail so I received it on Friday - not bad considering it was shipped from Hawaii.  The 4.4 pound bag came with directions for a commercial grade ice cream maker and directions for a one quart home ice cream maker.  My Cuisinart Soft Serve Ice Cream Maker actually holds one and a half quarts but I followed the instructions for the one quart. I followed the directions for the personal ice cream maker, but I was getting nervous when it didn’t seem to be hardening.  I used straight water for the mix and used the full amount recommended.  They do mention that you can substitute some or all of the water with milk or pineapple juice instead and also decrease the amount of water/juice/milk to make it creamier.

In hindsight, perhaps the water I added was not cold enough, but I was starting to worry that my first attempt of making the Dole Whip was going to go to waste.  The only comfort would have been that I only used 11 ounces of the bag and if I would have ruined this batch, I still had enough for at least five more.  After what seemed like an eternity, the mix started to freeze and I started to get excited.  Would the Dole Whip mix really be as good as a Disney Dole Whip?  My mouth was watering at the thought of it.  It sure smelled like ones from Disney that I remembered- very pineapply.

When it was finally done, it did not  harden as much as I would have liked, and it wasn’t as creamy, but the taste was OH SO GOOD!  With the next batch, I am going to try less liquid and use milk and see if it makes it more creamy.  (UPDATE: I made another batch and used all milk instead of water. It was much creamer and even better than before. I recommend using milk instead of water when following the instructions). Either way, if you do buy a bag of pineapple Dole Whip mix, you won’t be disappointed because it IS that good!  This frozen delight was a huge hit at my house the day I made it.  EVERYONE  loved it - adults and kids alike.

I should warn you that Dole Whip mix is not cheap.  It cost $23.95 for the mix and $12.35 to ship (it is shipped by Priority Mail only) for a grand total of $36.30.  Pretty expensive for a darn frozen dessert now isn’t it?  At that price, it is not something you would be able to keep on hand all the time.  But…if you are looking for something different, something that will take you right back to the “Happiest Place on Earth” where you first discovered this frozen heaven, then I say “Go for it!”   Buy a bag and whip up a batch for special occasions or when you are in the mood for something different and want to give your taste buds a real treat.  It will be sure to be the best $36.30 you have ever spent!

Enjoy!

*FYI* Mixing Ratio for 1-Quart Ice Cream Machines:

1. Fill a clean mixing container with 1/2 quart of cool tap water.

2. Add 1 and 1/3 cup (approx. 11 oz) of Dole dry soft serve mix. ***You may adjust the water or product amounts depending on your taste preferences (less water makes a creamier product).

3. Stir with wire whip until mix is completely dissolved. (approx. 1-2 minutes).

4. Add water until the level reaches the 1-quart line.

5. Stir again with wire whip until completely mixed (approx. 30 seconds).

6. Pour the mixture into your soft serve machine.

***You can experiment with the taste be replacing some of the water with pineapple juice or, if you are not lactose-intolerant, with milk or half and half.

Front Load Washers: Are They Better Than Top Loaders?

You may have wondered if front load washers are really that much better that top load washers.  Well I believe they most definitely are, and in this review, I’ll explain why and let you draw your own conclusion.

If you have read how I loathe doing laundry, then you understand why it is so important that I have a washer and dryer that will make doing laundry as painless as possible.  When we moved, we left our old washer and drier behind so we needed to buy a new set.  Thanks to my hubby (and with some of my own gentle nudging and not so subtle hints) I now have what I believe to be the best washer and dryer I have ever owned.  It’s the Whirlpool Duet front loading washer and Whirlpool Duet Steam drier.  Instead of buying a top loader, I was able to convince him to get a front load washer.

Everyone realizes that front load washers are at least a few hundred dollars more expensive than their top loading counterparts.  Unless you have money to burn, it is a good idea to take a look at why the extra money is going to be worth it, and if you can make up some or all of that money in the long run.  Let’s take a look at some of the advantages that need to determine if the extra money is worth it.

First of all, any new washer or drier is going to be more energy efficient than those that are  several years old.  Front load washers are very efficient.  How are they more efficient?  Well certainly they use a lot less water.  Front load washers can use between 10-15 gallons of water per load.  Some top loaders can use up to as much as 40 gallons per load.  Front loaders work by spinning the clothes through the water so not as much is needed.  Top loaders need enough water to submerge the clothes as it spins them against the agitator (and how often do you get right the selection of what size load you have?  More than likely you probably end up wasting more water).

So imagine the potential of saving 25+ gallons of water per load of laundry.  Not to mention the fact that you are going to save on the energy (gas or electricity) needed to heat the water, unless you wash everything in cold water.

With my old drier, I would often have to run the clothes through two cycles to get them dry.  Often this is a function of how wet the clothes are when you put them into the drier and how large a load you are drying.  I never realized how wet the clothes were coming out of my old washing machine until I started using my new front loader.  One of the advantages of a front loader is that they can spin at much higher speeds than top loaders.  The higher speed spins out more water, leaving the clothes drier when the cycle is completed.  However, since they spin at much higher speeds, you’ll want to be sure it’s properly balanced otherwise the shaking may make you think your house has been relocated to the launch pad when the Space Shuttle takes off.

With the high spin rate, it is amazing how dry the clothes are when the spin cycle is complete - I could almost skip the drier altogether and just put them away.  This helps to save even more money because as your clothes are not as wet when they go into the drier, your drier doesn’t have to work as hard and use as much energy to dry the clothes.  Since your clothes don’t need to be in the drier as long, you can get your laundry done quicker.

At this point you’re probably thinking OK, so maybe there are some savings I’ll get, but is it really going to be enough to make it worth while just for the savings alone?

Yes, it is!  Don’t believe me?  That’s cool.  If you’re a numbers kind of gal, this article breaks down the savings for you in all the categories I mentioned above and shows how the average break even point is about 4 years.  I’m sure most people keep their washers and driers at least that long.  Lets face it, energy is not getting cheaper so the more you can save with your washer and drier the better (and the shorter the break even period will be).

The advantages of the front load washers from an efficiency standpoint are pretty clear.  What else makes them attractive?  Well, have you ever tried to jam a king sized comforter in a top load washing machine?  Think Rosie O’Donnell in stretch pants…it just ain’t pretty.  With a front load washer you can stick a lot more clothes in there, including those large items you probably end up toting off to the dry cleaner.  The Whirlpool Duet holds 16 pairs of jeans.  Try that in a top loader!

Then of course there is the agitator…doing what it is supposed to do. It agitates and will cause more damage to your clothes than just spinning them through the water in the same way your drier works.  It is just not as gentle on your clothes.

Front load washing machines use high efficiency (HE) laundry detergent which is low sudsing. You cannot use the regular detergent you would use with a regular top loader. The method of tumbling the clothes through the water instead of using an agitator would create more suds so you want to be sure to use detergents that are specially formulated for front loaders. You’ll want to look for detergent with the HE logo on it or some mention that it is specifically for front load washing machines.

Years ago it may have been a problem finding HE laundry detergent, but now it’s not much of an issue. You’ll also save money because you will use less detergent.  The first bottle of detergent I bought, and it was a big one, lasted me almost 4 months!

And finally, unless you stack them, it’s nice to have another flat surface to use for folding, keeping the laundry basket on, etc. that the front loader provides.  The top of a top loader always seems like a convenient shelf until you need to do a load of laundry.

So are there any disadvantages to front load washers besides the up front cost?  Well, there are a few things that are different.  The main one is that you are going to need to bend down to put the clothes into the washer and take them out.  For a lot of people, the bending down to put clothes in and take clothes out of a front load washer with an opening much closer to the floor may present a problem.  Of course the manufacturers thought of this and sell pedestals that will raise the washers and driers up.  For my particular model there is a 10″ pedestal and a 15.5″ pedestal which would raise up each machine and give me a drawer to store my laundry supplies.  On the surface, it seems like a no brainer to get a pair of these.  Now remember these machines are very heavy so the pedestals must be strong, but they usually cost on the order of a couple hundred dollars a piece!  That’s right, when we bought our new set, Sears wanted $250 per pedestal!

Now fortunately, I am young enough that my back is still in pretty good shape and I knew my husband wasn’t going to go for that.  Can you image what kind of day at the spa I could have for $500 bucks?  Seriously, I don’t know what the pedestals are made of, but it seems like a lot of money for what you get.  So if you want to raise up your washer and dryer and make it easier to load and unload the clothes, just be prepared to pay for it.

There is another disadvantage, which is trivial, but a disadvantage nonetheless.  We’ve all had this happen.  You put all the laundry in your machine and start it up.  It’s chugging away and you find some wayward sock or stray pair of underwear that you forgot your husband didn’t get in the hamper or shoved under the bed.  After cursing him, you decide to open the lid, flip it in, and go on your merry way.  That works great for a top loader, but not so much for a front loader.  Once the water starts filling the tub, the door is locked and mister stinky sock is going to have to wait for the next go around.  Well, sort of.  There is an unlock/pause button and once pressed, the machine will unlock itself when it is safe (when the water gets to a point where it can stop filling the machine) to open the door so you can add something.  However, you still risk a little water dripping out off of the door when you open it so unless you really need to add something, it is not worth the aggravation.

I have had my front loader washer and drier almost a year and I must say, I do highly recommend them.  I like mine in particular, but even if you choose not to go with a Whirlpool, I suggest that if you are in the market for a new washer, seriously consider a front loading one.  I absolutely love mine.  Don’t get me wrong, I STILL loathe doing laundry.  But I’ll admit, having these new machines does make my laundry experience a little less painful.

Beware Of The Virus Pits

Today was the first official day of Camp Mommy.  Since it is so freakin hot outside, I decided (against my better judgement) to take my boys to an indoor kids gym which is full of inflatable slides and bounce houses.

Let me be clear.  I am not a fan of these types of places and consider them nothing more than virus pits.  And I have good reason.  When Alex was 15 months old, I took him to a mall where they have one of those little play areas in the middle of it.  It was a decent sized area/pit with padded walls and floors and a bunch of little foam faux fruits and veggies that toddlers could climb on, under or through.  Fun right?  Sure it was fun.  Alex loved it.  No one seemed to care or even notice that it reeked of poopie diapers.  Except me.  Oh well.  You have to expect Eau de Poop in a place like that anyway right?  Besides, he was having a good time and I was having a much needed break while he played.  I did however make sure to thoroughly wash his hands when he was finished playing and we were on our way home.

Fast forward three days.

Alex woke up with a high fever and could not stop vomiting.  He couldn’t even keep water down.  He was up all night vomiting and I was right there changing his clothes (and my own) after each episode while trying to calm him down and keep him as comfortable as possible.  He was finally able to keep the Tylenol down and the fever broke but then he threw in a bonus for me:  Diarrhea.  Lucky me.

I took him to the pediatrician the next morning and that is when I learned that Alex had rotavirus.  The nurse had me bring in a poopie diaper so they could test it and sure enough, it was positive for rotavirus.  If you are not familiar with rotavirus, I hope to God you never will be because it is miserable for everyone involved.  Basically, it is a gastrointestinal virus that commonly affects kids before they are two years old.  It starts with a fever, then vomiting and diarrhea.   Although the vomiting doesn’t last long, the diarrhea can last anywhere from five to seven days.  Nice huh?  Oh and there is absolutely NO mistaking when a child has this virus because the stench of the diarrhea is like NOTHING you have EVER smelled.  It is THE MOST funky smell…I can’t even begin to describe it but trust me, you’ll know if your child has it.  Alex had the “poopies” for exactly seven days and his little butt was so raw from constantly going, he would scream bloody murder every time he went.  And there was nothing I could do about it.  Just on one day, and this is no exaggeration, he soiled 15 diapers.  Every time we changed one, he would go again.  We went through an entire box of Aveeno Baby Bath and a tube of Boudreaux’s Butt Paste.  The whole experience was awful and that is putting it mildly.

So that is the reason why I despise these kind of places.  Oh and FYI: the incubation period for rotavirus is THREE DAYS FROM EXPOSURE!  Yep.  Three days before my kid was puking and pooping his brains out we were at the mall in the virus pit.  You do the math.

Back to today. 

The boys had a blast jumping around on at least ten different HUGE inflatables and their sweat soaked hair was proof of it.  They jumped and slid their butts off for two hours and were finally ready to go home at 6:00 p.m.   Of course I made sure that we all went into the bathroom and washed our hands and believe it or not, that is where I decided today would be the last time I would come to this place.  Why?  Because while I was in there, a woman walked in and cut in front of me, went straight to the sink (there was only ONE sink) and began to furiously wash her hands.  She apologized for jumping in front of me and said that her son had blood on his sock (it is a requirement that all the kids wear socks to play) and it wasn’t HIS blood and she touched it so she wanted to wash her hands.  I told her to take as long as she wanted.  I was completely skeeved out after that and was more than ready to leave if I wasn’t before that.

But wait.  It gets better.  After I got home I spoke to a friend and told her the story about the blood and she said “Wait.  I have a better one for you.  We were there last week and my son went down one of the slides and when he got off he was all wet.  I asked him why he was wet and he said they have a water slide in here now!  I thought maybe it was water or soda that another kid spilled but it turned out that some little girl peed herself while on the slide and my son slid down in it!” 

OMG!

How disgusting is that?  She told the manager and they did close down the slide to clean and disinfect it.  They also gave my friend free passes to come back another time since she had to leave and change her son out of his stranger-piss soaked clothes.  Still.  Would you go back there after that? 

Not me.

I am DONE with that place.

Camp Mommy has left the building…for good!

Camp Mommy Now Open For Business

Just wanted to let you all know that I survived kindergarten!  Oh yeah…and so did my son.

Yep.  Today was Alex’s kindergarten graduation and a day for me to stop and ask myself “where in the hell did the time go?”  Seriously.  It seems like just yesterday that he was born and my biggest concern was how I was going to make it through my year goal of breastfeeding or how I was going to change his diaper in the dark, in the middle of the night, and without waking him up. 

Thankfully, I survived the trials and tribulations of being a new mom and look at me now…six years later!   I feel like a damn rockstar right now because at the beginning, I remember thinking I wouldn’t make it through six hours being someones mom let alone six years.  But I can say whole-heartedly, without question or doubt, they have been the BEST years of my life to date.

I am so very proud of my little man and I am so incredibly blessed to be his mother.  He had a fantastic kindergarten year and although he is excited to start first grade, he is happy to have a break.

So am I.

From making his lunch every day.

I’m not kidding.  I am so over the lunches.  I would love to say that I am happy that I will finally be able to sleep in every morning but I am realistic…not delusional. 

School is out but Camp Mommy starts tomorrow.  Oh joy.  It is going to be a looong summer.  Ideas anyone?

When Will My 3 Year Old Stop Treating His Penis Like a Hose?

Dennis has been potty trained for well over six months now and I still cannot get the child to stop peeing all over the toilet seat.  It’s no secret that women have issues with the whole up vs. down toilet seat debate but this one requires no debate whatsoever.

I don’t care if you are male or female, YOU JUST DON’T PEE ON THE SEAT!  Period!  Nothing irks me more than when I go into a public restroom, push open the stall door and there is pee all over the toilet seat!  It’s a women’s bathroom!  I do realize that most women, including myself, will not actually sit down on the seat and will squat over it instead (I mean they are friggin gross so why would you plant your perfectly clean ass on it?) but come on ladies…if your stream misses the bowl and you end up spraying your urine all over the seat, WIPE IT UP!  Is that really too much to ask?  Why should I have to wipe YOUR pee off the seat?  I have to deal with that enough in my own house.  I shouldn’t have to do it in a public bathroom too.  Ughhh…Gross!

Sorry.  Since I am talking about toilet seat issues in my house it made me think of my distaste for public restrooms and I got a little off topic.

Back to my 3 year old who evidently thinks his penis is a hose.  Okay, I do need to give Dennis a little credit.  He was potty trained at two and a half years old which is a huge accomplishment after what I went through with my first son and trying to potty train him.   But as smart as Dennis is, sometimes it amazes me how after wetting four shirts in the same day, he just cannot figure out why it keeps happening.

The whole routine goes something like this:

D: I need to pee.

Me:  Okay.  Go pee.  Take your pants off IN the bathroom (he’ll usually just drop them wherever he is standing), make sure you hold up your shirt, and push your pee pee down.

D: Okay Mommy.

He’ll come back out of the bathroom, I help him out his pants back on, and we continue whatever we were doing before the potty break.

Then I have to pee.

I go into the bathroom but I don’t turn on the light, and I sit down on the toilet.  Huh?  WTF!!!  Why is my butt wet?  Fantastic!  I just sat in toddler pee.

It happens almost every time.  Until now.  Because I finally got smart and started turning the light on every time and fully inspecting the toilet seat before I sit down.  But I shouldn’t have to do that now should I?  Ummm…no.  Because Dennis does know how to hold his penis down and shoot it in the bowl not all over it.  I’ve watched him do it “right”.  It’s when I’m not watching that he decides to hose down the toilet.  Sometimes if I am really lucky, he will get the floor too and leave me yet another mess to clean up.  Love when that happens.  Not.

As far as peeing all over his shirt, I finally figured out why that sometimes happens after observing him when he didn’t know I was watching.  He holds up his shirt when he starts the flow, but it seems the problem is that he lets the shirt down too early resulting in a nice wet urine stain on the bottom of it.  One day this happened four times- no exaggeration.  Since I figured this out, I started making sure that I go into the bathroom with him so I can remind him what to do to avoid these little accidents.  So far so good.  I’ve got a clean toilet seat, clean floor, and a clean shirt and keeping my fingers crossed that Dennis will be able to keep up the streak when I am not there to supervise.  In the meantime I’ll have to keep up my home toilet seat inspection otherwise I will risk my own ass…if you know what I mean.

My Date With A Little Hottie

Today is Sunday and I decided to bag the grocery shopping trip (no pun intended) and take my son Alex out on a date.  Just the two of us.  Mommy and her big boy.  We went to see the movie UP in 3-D and had plans to go have lunch together at a real restaurant.  Something other than McDonalds.  Those places DO exist don’t they because if it’s not in a Happy Meal box I wouldn’t know.  Alex was so excited about our day together and to be perfectly honest, so was I. 

Alex and I rarely ever get to spend quality alone time togther so this was a nice treat for both of us.  For me it was about the time not the movie.  I just really wanted time alone with him since he always has to share me with his uber needy little brother.   Today it was all about Alex.  I told him we could do whatever he wanted to do and he chose to go to the movies.

We both really enjoyed UP but I’m not so sure it was worth the extra $3.50 to see in 3-D.  My son was extremely disappointed about the 3-D because he expected a bunch of things to be flying out at him and nothing did.  The only 3-D movie he has seen before UP was at Disney World called Mickey’s Philharmagic which he absolutely loved.  Pixar animation did another stellar job with UP but in my opinion, you can still enjoy the poor man’s version -sans the 3-D. 

I cannot believe how frickin expensive movies are these days.  I remember when I thought a $5.00 movie was a lot.  Good God by the time we got our popcorn and soda I was out $32.00.   To think I used to laugh at my mom for smuggling a couple cans of soda and a bag of microwave popcorn in her purse.  Had I taken her lead I could have saved myself at least twelve bucks and bought a cute t-shirt at the Target next door.  But, whaddaya do?  Money was no object today.   I would have paid just about anything as long as Alex was happy.

The cost of the movies ended up being a wash anyway. We both stuffed ourselves with popcorn so we weren’t hungry when the movie was over, therefore, we decided to skip having our restaurant lunch.  I had to pick up a few things at BJ’s on the way home so Alex and I settled on a slice of pizza there instead.

Today turned out to be a really nice day with my baby who isn’t such a baby anymore.  I realized that I need to make it a point to do this date thing with him more often since I know it will only be a matter of time before Alex trades me in for a real girlfriend.  A girl who will be able to hook him up with things other than popcorn and a pizza slice!

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